neglectful

Greetings,
So i've come to the conclusion that I'm not a very good blogger. I haven't made a post since I was in my third trimester with my son Julen and I am now in my third trimester with my daughter Morgan. She's probably going to be born by cesarean section on June 14th, 2010.

Life has definitely gone interestingly to say the least.

Julen was born June 8th, 2009. I had an emergancy cesarean because his cord was wrapped around his neck. He was in the NICU for about a week and a half and was a complete miracle. They told us that he was going to either die, go into a coma, be mentally retarded, or suffer from debilatating seizures for his entire life. He, I'm very glad to say has done none of those things. He's now eleven months old and the happiest person I know. That boy is my everything, he's the glue that holds my world together.

Courtney and I are divorcing. It's one of the hardest things in my life that I've ever had to handle. With each day that goes on I realize that much more how much I love him and how terribly I'm going to miss everything we shared. We're trying to maintain a good relationship which I think we're doing an impeccable job at. He and I are getting along more now than we have in quite some time. He's going to obviously be there for the birth of our daughter and i'm glad. Even though he won't be in my life anymore I'll always have a piece of him, our children. I hope that he will be happy and that his life will turn out well for him. I just hate how much its hurting me. Everyday is a struggle for me but I put on a happy face and I just get through it. I have to change the subject now.

More about my little Julen ("bubba") He's walking now and has the six most adorable teeth I've ever seen. His upper teeth have this hilarious little gap in them it makes his smile that much more amazing. He is honestly the most stunning human being I've ever seen, and I'm not just saying that since he's my son if I saw any other person on earth carrying him around i would just be flabbergasted at his beauty. I hope our little girl looks like him but I know she'll be gorgeous no matter what.

If Morgan is born on June 14th like we planned our little ones will be 371 days apart!!!

I'm graduating in June I'm doing the extended campus program at Lewis & Clark Alternative school and I'll be starting Apollo College in September. I'm really scared but it's something that definitely needs to be done. I used to be so excited for school, now all i really want to do is just be at home with my babies. I'm going to miss the lifestyle i had as a housewife.

Julen wants some Mommy and Me time now... I'll try and post more often. =/

--Ashley